Perfection...

well almost, kind of, sort of, not. Another new lesson that I have learned since being a Mom - nothing is ever perfect or complete. I've heard older, wiser women talk about this before but it is a new reality. Before having Caroline, I could do whatever I wanted with my time. Nothing in our home was ever perfect. We almost always had clean laundry laying on our bedroom floor, there were dishes to be done and dust to be dusted. However, if I wanted my home to be "perfect" I always had the time to get it done, had I really wanted it done.

Since Caroline has arrived there seems to be less time. :-) I have a long to do list and it just keeps growing. I like to feel like I'm on the ball and I like to complete projects. As my faithful blog readers read in a recent post, I want to feel productive. However, it is just not happening these days and I have come to realize that I need to be OK with that.

Mark and I talk several times a week about how thankful we are for our family, friends, home, church, etc. Thankfulness has almost become part of our daily conversation because we both feel it so deeply. Sunday afternoon we were sitting around talking about what a great weekend we had and how we are so thankful. Our life seems "perfect" or almost. :-) However, I couldn't help but acknowledge that while I am so thankful there is still an unsettled piece of me. When I thought of why that might be I thought of the mess of clean laundry on our bedroom floor and the leaves out front that need to be raked and how it was such a beautiful day that I wanted to go out and play. There was still much to be done. Mark, being the sweet husband decided that we should take care of some of that. We went outside and started raking leaves. We raked and raked for about an hour and then realized we had to go. Lindsay and Brad had agreed to watch Caroline for us while we went on a date. Mark started putting the rakes away and I thought I might have a nervous breakdown (it really wasn't bad). We left 3 piles of leaves in our front yard, half the yard raked and clean and the other half still full of leaves! I couldn't believe that we weren't going to finish the project, that it wasn't going to be complete or "perfect." I decided I could go along with Mark since he didn't seem to care. We dropped Caroline off with Lindsay and had a great date night!! We came home and the leaves and laundry were still there but I had a calm heart. We had spent time together and had done our best. Mark definitely helped to reinforce a good lesson! In the mess and chaos of this world, my life is not going to be perfect or complete. There is always going to be work to do. I will always find something else to put on my list. However, I'm hoping with each passing day that I get better and better about getting the important things done first and that I don't worry about the rest.