No sleep yet

Lately my favortie time of the day has been bedtime. I try to coerce Mark into bed earlier and earlier every night. By the end of the day I am worn out. I am physically tired but also just tired of my head spinning with the days to do list. It's the most wonderful feeling to crawl into bed and snuggle up in the warm covers, finally feeling myself relax. However, I think my most favorite part of going to bed is getting to talk to Mark. Of course, we have lots of evenings together and we no longer have tv to keep our minds occupied. But, the conversation in bed always seems the best. Then, there is really nothing else around to distract. Almost every night I say to Mark, "I'm so tired but I don't want to go to sleep yet." It's a strange feeling. It's kind of like I'm afraid that if I go to sleep I will miss something. At night time, there is a peace and quiet; the world has slowed down. In the back of my head I guess I just realize that when I finally allow myself to go to sleep I will awake in the morning with another to do list. I will be "separated" from the people that I love in order to take care of things that "have" to be done. It's a strange cycle...this thing called life. We keep moving and moving and things rarely slow down. I just want things to move at a slower pace all the time so that at the end of the day I can feel peaceful going to sleep, not feeling like I am going to miss a sweet, quiet moment with those that I love.

It definitely makes me contemplate how I am spending my days and especially the order of my priorities. Mark and I went out to breakfast this morning and then we hiked Kennesaw Mountain. We talked about making breakfast out (and maybe a hike) a weekly tradition. I'm not sure if that will happen but I like the thought. I am now (writing a blog) and getting ready to bake some cookies for the Super Bowl party tomorrow. Mark is out working on the dresser for the baby room. It feels good to know that we have already spent some quality time together and that now we can do our separate things for awhile. However, I'm sure tonight I will have the same feeling of, "I'm tired but I don't want to go to sleep yet." You see, this will be our last time together for awhile. We will be at church tomorrow morning, visiting friends who just had a baby tomorrow afternoon, back to church tomorrow night and then to a Super Bowl party. Mark will leave early Monday morning for out of town and will not return until Thursday night (small group night) and then work all day Friday. I will not really get to have another peaceful, quiet moment with him until next Friday. Maybe my thoughts of wanting to not let go of the moment aren't so crazy after all!! Or so I would like to think...